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saturday, december 30 Damn it. About an hour and a half ago, I posted something but stupid blogger or stupid internet didn't save it. What's the deal? Not that it was interesting. I'll just post something else. About 20 minutes ago, I got off the phone with Matt. That was the single most interesting phone call of my life - basically I listened while he and his best friend Arthur argued about guitars and how, buy attempting to fix Matt's, both his and Arthur's were going to end up broken. I suppose it is the thought that counts, I mean.. at least he bothered to call me, he wasn't even at home.. I'm just a bit annoyed that he called me and spent the whole time talking to Art. I hate things. I never got Voodoo downloaded. Can't find it. That's not what I'm paranoid about, however, the problem may be much more serious than that. Unfortunately, I have no flipping idea what the problem is, or if there even is one. I just don't like it when [I got distracted. I have no idea what I'm trying to say here]. The past two days, all I've wanted to do was download "voodoo" by godsmack and find the lyrics to the song "institutionalized" by suicidal tendencies. But can I do either? NO. [more distractions] SUCCESS! I found the lyrics. I think I'll post them here just to make you angry. INSTITUTIONALIZED Yeah.. moving on, I still want to listen to Voodoo but for the life of me, I can't figure out where to download it without downloading Napster, which I refuse to do.. I guess I'll check mp3.com, at least I can stream those.. no nasty downloads. Oh well. I don't care any more. Really, I don't, I may be a waste of time but at least I'm a waste of time on my own, I don't take shit from any one. Get the picture? Everyone's favorite actor is online, but the funny thing is, the more I think about it, the less I want to talk to him or have anything to do with him. I mean.. he's a very good looking man, but damn, if I had to choose between him and Matt, there is no way in hell I'd choose him. Shit, if I had to choose between him and Culosi I'd choose Culosi. Come to think of it, I should write up a page that tells who all these queers are, but I probably won't. Not like anyone knows this exists, and even if they did, why would they care? I rather enjoy my ability to be nonexistant and have no one care about me at all. Wanna buy me a gift? I'd like the Limp Bizkit cd, Significant Other. I had it for probably 3 months last year when I stole it from this girl Diane, but I had to give it back. I'd like to have that cd again. I really hate radio.sonicnet, it makes me so angry.. there's no point to it, and the Daria station plays maybe one good song for every 10 songs it plays. And goddamn, I'm sick of "take a picture". I was high yesterday, though the cause of this high is as of yet undetermined. It might have been a good old fashioned case of punch-drunkenness, considering I was on the phone until 11 and full of sugar. "Mommy, why don't I have any friends?" When that question (sans the "mommy" part) was posed to the magical Matt, his answer was "you do have friends. what about sarah and emily? they're your friends." Sarah, I had to remind him, hates me. She has for a while, though her admitting it would probably be a problem. I don't care; she just doesn't belong on any list of "friends." Now I'm just wasting time. I don't have anything meaningful to say. you know I love you. God, I feel special. (mommy felt bad for me because I'm so terribly depressed, Christmas sucks and I have no friends.) i can't type tonight. I wish I was more able to say the things I mean, and to know what other people mean when they say things.. i.e., what does "close to" mean? Ah well. It's alllll good. |
